Drumroll, fanfare, trumpets, cheerleaders and journalists get ready!
It’s time to celebrate as I am a Complaint Free Champion!
Yesterday I woke up with a huge smile on my face, satisfied that I had stuck with the challenge and managed to go 21 days without complaining. I feel a huge sense of pride and achievement and basically I’m buzzing. When I started the challenge I really wasn’t sure when I would see the finish line. In the book ‘A Complaint Free World’ by Will Bowen, he stated that it takes most people between 4-8 months to complete.
Side note: To all those that may have stumbled across my blog from the first time and are wondering what’s with the Oscar style speech, head over to my other post to find out more about the challenge: Could you do the Complaint Free Challenge?
On Saturday 4th January aka Day 19, I knew I was going to get to Day 21 in this round because I lost my purple wristband. In the spiritual world it is often said that you lose things when you no longer require them. I was clothes shopping for warm jumpers, yes – I’m getting more sensible and had a little jumper shopping spree at Uniqlo. I came home with 3 new jumpers and no wristband.
The bright purple band has been a fantastic reminder that I was doing the challenge and it keep me on track. Boy, let me tell you the amount of times I pulled and twisted that band when I felt annoyed and wanted to let of steam. There were days I’m sure I got rubber burns from the constant twisting. I highly recommend getting a wristband to anyone that decides to embark on the challenge – such a great support.
I hope whoever has found my wristband looks up A Complaint Free World and decides to jump into the challenge.
The other thing that was a great support to me was proclaiming on my blog and social media accounts that I was taking part in the challenge. I am a person that 90% of the time will stick to my word if I have said it to someone else. I don’t like to let people down. Myself? Gees, I let myself down ALL the time – something I’m working on but that’s a challenge for another day.
Keeping me going was posting each day on my Instagram story and the support I got from friends. People: saying they were proud of me, cheering me on or saying they were interested in doing the challenge themselves.
When I started the challenge:
- it was the 8th October 2019 and I reached Day 21 on the 6th January. That equates to 91 days or 13 weeks or 3 months. Which is shorter than the average time to complete but I believe I did it in that time because I love a challenge.
- I was in a very needy place. I needed for this to work. I needed to stop complaining. I didn’t want to be the one to blame for my health.
- I was on a rollercoaster of emotions, constantly dipping and feeling down and I didn’t know how to stop feeling the gloom.
- I was mainly letting life take control and moaning about the outcome.
When I heard about the book:
I TOOK ACTION
What I wasn’t expecting was the amount of changes I would see on my journey to the 21 days. My life has literally changed. Not all down to the challenge but it certainly has played a HUGE part.
What helped me to stay complaint free each day was to start the each morning with a positive routine which includes journaling, meditation, affirmations and dancing around my room to the most upbeat music.
I also found workarounds where I could still air my views but in a diplomatic, ‘matter-of-fact’ way none moaning way. I would steer away from playing the victim and adding extra fuel to the vitriol bonfire.
The last 21 days
I am so proud of myself to have completed the challenge during the Christmas period because I tend to struggle around this time: – check out my post: Tis the season for: Overwhelm, Joy and Festive Comedowns! to find out more.
During the past 21 days I have seen people upset and wanting me to join them in letting off steam, arguments and disagreements, friends trying to derail me (yup that’s you Burger…) and have been ghosted by not one, not two but three guys (so much for having eggs in separate baskets). Throughout all this I kept that wristband on my right wrist! Instead of moaning and slipping back to day 1, I found solutions.
- I cancelled my gym membership which was like trying to buy Glasto tickets every time you booked a session and the staff seemed disinterested.
- I deleted every single guy I had ever matched with, dated, chatted to from my phone. Yay to being ghosted – it was such an empowering process.
- I took myself home when I felt uncomfortable and stayed away from the arguing.
- I stopped myself from ranting midway and turned it into a weird tune (that is allowed and I did it many times).
- I stayed quiet or didn’t agree when someone else chose to moan. Sidenote: I never call anyone else out on moaning, it is not for me to tell someone that.
I quit my job. I freakin’ QUIT MY JOB!
Monday was Day 21 and I was meant to have a driving lesson. My first in 3 weeks. My instructor had to cancel because there was something wrong with the break fluid. I immediately took this as a sign that I was 100% going to complete because I’m not the most confident of drivers and moan about myself rather than the other drivers.
What I noticed
The times that I mainly fell back to Day 1 were when I was:
- drinking alcohol, having more than a couple of drinks. I either couldn’t remember if I moaned, so switched my wristband or went into full on moan mode.
- at work, which helped me make my decision to
Quit my job. Freakin’ QUIT MY JOB!
When you tell people you’re doing the complaint free challenge a lot of them will fall into one of two camps:
- Immediately declare that they would never be able to stop complaining/they don’t want to stop and it’s normal to complain, that’s what people do.
- Notice that they are complaining around you and apologise – this is so cute but you don’t have to do that.
Another huge thing that I noticed was that I became more accepting of people. I saw people from a different perspective, trying to get on with their own lives with a plethora of thoughts, issues, goals, dreams and worries circulating their mind. Most of the time they don’t mean to bump into you, walk slow, chew loudly, not give you the best service, forget about your feelings – they’re just doing them. It made me fall in love with people a little bit more.
I have absolutely loved doing this challenge and although I am not going to keep track I am going to continue on this path.
For those who say they couldn’t do it but really would like to try. I say go for it. I am here to help you out, cheer you on and believe in you.
I had to re-start 21 times and each of those times I learnt something about myself and additional tools to get me to that finish line. You have to be honest with yourself and trust the process, and believe me if you do you will see a change.
Thank you for all those that have really wanted me to achieve. Yesterday I bought myself a bunch of flowers to celebrate.
P.S. I would really like to pay it forward and therefore I am offering to buy the book for three people who are really interested in fully trying the challenge aka ‘not wanting the book to lay unopened on your shelf’. If you would like the book, please drop me a comment below and I’ll be in touch.
P.P.S. If you’ve liked this blog post, I would welcome a like, a comment or a share. Now that I am soon to be jobless I am looking at different career paths and writing may be one of them so the more people that see my work, the better.
P.P.P.S. Thank you xxx