“You can do it, you’re nearly there.” Came the voice from below.
What I really wanted to do was prove myself right and admit defeat – I can’t do this. I don’t have the strength or the skills. I’m not strong enough. Followed by ‘I told you so’!
My body clearly hadn’t got the memo and continued to climb, grunt and groan and although not graceful I reached the top.
Back at the bottom, I was greeted with a big grin, a high-five and an overwhelming sense of pride. I looked up at the wall and at what I had just achieved and there it was – the light bulb moment – this wasn’t just a climbing wall – this was a life lesson!
In order for me to be my best self, I need…….
- people
- support
- cheering on
- accountability
Having the belief in myself and determination isn’t always going to be present, or in fact, enough.
We continued to climb and I continued to surprise myself and I stopped worrying about; how I looked, all the people around me and what they were thinking. At times I struggled and had to retreat but I got back up!
One time I chose to scale an easier path to the top! This was met with “I’m not going to give you a high-five for that, it was too easy for you”. I knew this and I laughed – it reminded me of a quote I came across on the internet.
I have spent so much time and money working on myself, finding out who I really am and what makes me shine, so it really made me laugh that a £12.50 bouldering trip finally cemented the fact that I can’t do this thing called life on my own!
My own fears of not wanting to be a burden on others and not wanting to embarrass myself. Coupled with being scared of not succeeding and to actually ask for help – as that would be admitting that I can’t do it! I chose instead the easy path, playing small and playing safe and the reward? Compromising on my goals.
On the journey home I reflected on some of the times that I had accomplished goals that I’d set
- The job promotions – asking for help/support from colleagues
- 100 Happy Days – accountability from social media presence
- Public Speaking achievements – cheered on/ supportive coaches
They all have one thing in common, and that is community. The power of community and more importantly, the power of being able to be vulnerable in that community, is so important! Having the right people around you is what can make all the difference.
Before I sign off I want to tell you about another community that I have recently become a part of. This is an online group on Facebook lead by the amazing Sammy Blindell, who is a branding expert, helping entrepreneurs to build their own brand. I joined the group after a recommendation from a friend and was soon involved in a 30 day challenge.
A challenge is an understatement! Day 2 and I wanted to throw in the towel but peer support kept me going and I continued on. I still had massive resistance and a week in I plucked up the courage to share that I had Imposter Syndrome. That I struggled with cooperating in groups as I believed nothing I said would be of any value. Put simply I was comparing myself with these entrepreneurs and felt like a small fish in the ocean!
My vulnerability led to messages of support and others also admitting that they often felt this way……and just like that – that community became my community – and I continued.
Fast forward to the end of the challenge and there were some prizes to be won for the people who had played full out, showed up and supported others. I came 2nd which meant I won a place on a 3-day course in France worth £1997!
I really couldn’t and wouldn’t have done it without the amazing support of the community and for that I am truly grateful. Plus the challenge gave me a foundation for my business, a new supportive community and the chance to be vulnerable many times over!
Bouldering affirmed to me that I need people around me, I need to take advice from others and be open to admit when I’m scared, feeling low or on the verge of quitting.
It also made me ache like fuck – I did it on Tues and 3 days later it still hurts every time I move! I didn’t sign up for that! My aches have been the constant reminder that if I am going to really go for what I want in this world – I have to let other people in on my journey.
Some people have the ability, motivation, and determination to get shit done on their own. I have finally admitted that I am NOT that type of person.
So pass me the personal trainer, life coach, cleaner, public speaking coach, brand expert, bouldering friend and more……
Emma x
https://www.facebook.com/Hallidayshealthzone
Instagram: @emmalouhalliday
This Vulnerable life 